WELCOME TO THE BAKWAAS GANG!!!!

WELCOME TO OUR VERY OWN BLOGSITE GUYS...WELCOME TO "THE BAKWAAS BLOG"

FOR ALL THOSE WHO CAME IN LATE....WE ARE FINAL YEAR COMPUTER SCIENCE STUDENTS FROM K.J SOMAIYA COLLEGE OF ENGINEERING.

THIS SITE IS A TRIBUTE TO ALL THOSE PRIVILEDGED MEMBERS OF THE GREATEST GANG IN ENGINEERING.... "THE BAKWAAS GANG"

From all the crap we have done...you wont ever believe that we are genuine engineering students who have got through all these three years with our gang members percentages ranging from 84% to 48%.Yet we consider ourselves hugely gigantic above all other enginnering gangs,students,teachers etc etc...

To become a bakwaas gang member you need to have 3 hugely important qualities

1) you must have a collosal ego and must pledge to the motto
"DARTA TOH HAI HI NAHI"

2)You got to be a guy who thought he was made for engineering and by now must have realised that he was meant to do anything but engineering

3) you must be always ready to go out on vacations to lonavla ,matheran or goa;always ready to see any jackass newly released movie; and always ready for a nightout at "priyank's place"..be it anytime,anyday,anymonth or anyyear.

As this site is open to all viewers it has become mandatory for me to introduce each and every member of bakwaas gang.




Let us go on with our introductions:







Name: Ameya Bhagat
Nickname: Bhagu, A-Bag
Characteristics:
1. Has never spoken to a girl in his entire life.
2. Knows more about Manchester United than Alex Fergusson himself.
3. Is a Hindu but enjoys beef more than Shawn.
4. Uses the loo once a week.
5. Is the only Maharastrian I know who hates Marathi.
6. Wears tees which have prints of US states/cities.
Famous Dialogues:
1. “Glory Glory Man United”
2. “Abhey! Yeh Neha blush kyun kar rahi hai!”
3. “Now or Never” (challenging Shawn in sem 6)
Mistakes Commited:
1. Telling the gang that he is creamy layer OBC.
2. Now or never.
3. Listening to Nishit and investing in GMDC
Aim in Life:
1. To settle down in Manchester.
2. To marry a Chinese girl.





Name: Kunj Chitalia
Nickname: Kunju
Characteristics:
1. Lives 10 minutes away from college, gets his bike and is still late.
2. Is ticklish at virtually every part of his body.
3. Forgets where he has parked his bike,
Famous Dialogues:
1)"khushboo mereko sikhaa"
2)Arent many...too lazy to talk something outstandingly memorable
Aim in life: To do his MBA from Somaiya after having spent his last 6 years here.
Mistakes committed:
1. Sitting ahead of Shawn and wearing a white tee.
2. Leaving his cell phone unattended during one of the night outs.





Name: Yogesh Chande
Nickname: Chandu, CR, Nirvana
Characteristics:
1. Is extremely secretive about himself and the things he knows.
2. Is a gizmo freak and knows everything about the latest gadgets in town.
3. Hugs every member of the bakwaas gang before each exam (I now think I know the reason why he does it! Its definitely not superstition. He knew in advance about who would be included in the gang!)
4. Already earns for himself and herself (read previous blog entry)
Famous dialogues:
1. “Main tujhe bata nahi sakta.”
2. “Kaam hai dost”
Aim in Life: To get married to bhabhi.
Mistakes committed:
1. Volunteering to become the CR.
2. Not being more discrete about his ‘kaam’.





Name: Prynk Dshmkh
Nickname: Darinda
Characteristics:
1. Inspite of being the only heir to a multi multi trillion dollar business, still uses a Nokia 1100.
2. Has never purchased a train ticket.
3. His mother relies on his friends to know his where abouts.
4. Once disappeared for 2 days without notice.
5. Copies from reference books in exams.
Famous Dialogues: Read the previous blog entries!
Aim in life:
1. To never get caught by the cops/TC/exam cell.
2. To get a girl who is rich, pretty and doesn’t mind him cheating on her!
Mistakes committed:
1. Doesn’t commit mistakes, only crimes/offences.





Name: Amit Baxi
Nickname: Baxi, NJ, Dragon (courtesy the emission of hookak from his nostrils) Characteristics:
1. Has the worst luck in the entire world
2. Remembers his marks, Shawn’s marks, the dates of all the exams that have taken place in engineering but manages to forget whatever he studies for his exams.
3. Wears his jeans extremely low, then fold its up.
4. Has a million dollar smile.
5. Has spikes which reflect his mood
Famous Dialogues:
1. “Abha Sharma is Jain na?”
2. “Char saal bitana hai sab logo ke saat”
3. “Neha, Neha, Neha”
Mistakes committed:
1. Made friends with Shawn (lol)
2. Said the top 3 good looking girls in class are “Neha, Neha, Neha”.




Name: Anurag Agrawal
Nickname: Sutta
Characteristics:
1. Hits people with cricket bats when angry.
2. Spends more time in Kanpur/Pune/Delhi than Mumbai.
3. The most well dressed gang member (have to praise him a bit, refer to point 1 for explanation).
4. Uses only tum and aap while speaking.
5. Unofficial cricket team captain.
Famous conversations:
Sutta: (looking at the bandra-worli sea link) “yeh bridge kahan thak jaata hai”
Bhalu: “seedha kanpur thak jaata hai sutta”
Aim in Life: To go back to Kanpur
Mistakes committed:
1. Driving at 80 km/hr on a slippery road.






Name: Mohit Dhamdere
Nickname: Dhamu, Rain
Characteristics:
1. Grandson of an educationist but still considers education an evil.
2. Talks to people (read girls) on orkut, even if he has never spoken to them in person.
3. Also known as ‘Maharastrian Lady Killer’, for the number of Marathi contacts he has in his phonebook.
4. Official team captain.
5. One of the two gang members in touch (not literally) with ‘HER’.
Famous Dialogues:
1. “Me tula nantar phone kartos”
Aim in Life: To become eligible for placements
Mistakes committed:
1. Being absent on the day of forming project groups.
2. Asking his brother to telebook tickets for “Phoonk”







Name: What’s there in a name?
Nickname: Kyun, tera kya hai?
Characteristics:
1. The most negative person in the world, isn’t he?
2. Has lately gone on a diet and lost a lot of weight, hasn’t he?
3. Answers every question with a question, doesn’t he?
Famous Dialogue:
1. "Huga na?” (not surprisings, end with a question mark!)
2. Yogesh: “Kidhar ja raha hai?”
Dhulla: “Kidhar jayega?”
3. Shawn (after being tickled): “Dhulla, tune kiya kya?”
Dhulla (angrily): “Main karega?”
Aim in Life:
1. To write a book “My questions to your solution”.
2. To earn more than KK.
Mistakes committed:
1. Making friends with KK.
2. Living in Dombivili for 17 years.








Name: Kushal Doshi
Nickname: Kaniya Kushal aka KK, Doggie, Cheapo
Characteristics:
1. Will eat anything as long as it’s free.
2. Will do anything as long as he is paid for it.
3. Orders jain sambar but has no inhibitions when it comes to liquor.
4. Saves money by not buying a ticket and sitting on the bus ka steps so the conductor doesn't see him.
5. If I were to elaborate on the different cheap giris of KK, blogpsot would run out of memory.
Famous Dialogues:
1. “Darta toh hai hi nahi dost”.
2. “Bow bow”.
Aim in life:
1. To do an MBA from any college but somaiya.
2. To earn more than Dhulla.
Mistakes committed:
1. Making friends with Dhulla.
2. Leaving his cell phone with Darinda.
3. Speaking on the cell phone during Pappu’s lecture.






Name: Bhavin Doshi
Nickname: BKD, Akbar
Characteristics:
1. Has spent all his life either singing or programming.
2. The fact that no one from our gang has got a drop because of attendance is thanks to his proxies.
3. Taught us TCS one day before the exam and still managed to get less than us.
4. Currently reading a book on Jainism values. (not because of respect to ‘The Jain’, but because he is a Jain)
5. Plans to remain a bachelor.
Famous dialogues:
1. “Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa”
Aim in life: To achieve nirvana while singing.
Mistakes committed:
1. Going to Matheran with the gang.
2. Publicly acknowledging that he has a crush on Asmita.





Name: Anil Iyer
Nickname: Anna
Characteristics:
1. Spends half of his time on the phone.
2. Spends the other half figuring which girl not to talk to.
3. Wears his jeans extremely low.
4. Still writes and learns his answers.
Famous dialogues:
1. “Khada hi reh accelerator pe”.
2. “Thoka dost, thoka” (after banging a paper)
3. “1450!!!!!”
Aim in life:
1. To earn enough money to spend on Shadan, Amruta etc etc
Mistakes committed:
1. Inviting the gang to his house.
2. Getting 1450 in GRE (that will cost him atleast 10K for partying)





Name: Rishi Gaggar
Nickname: Susti, DJ
Characteristics:
1. Is as lazy as a sloth.
2. Second most negative person in the world.
3. Manages to make the most sincere group of girls in class fall for him.
Famous dialogues: He is too lazy to speak. He just nods and grunts.
Aim in Life: To live effortlessly.
Mistakes committed:
1. Staring at Laxmi cutting a metal piece for half an hour (without knowing that a certain Shawn Francis was observing him).
2. Asking Baxi to ‘fix’ his drink.
3. Buying the same shirt as Shawn.




Name: Nishit Gogri
Nickname: Raja
Characteristics:
1. Self proclaimed ‘King of Thane’.
2. His life oscillates between Sensex and Nifty.
3. Cant travel by trains.
5. Loves Mitali mukherjee (news reader)
4. A voice as loud as a jet engine starting and as irritating as a rat squeaking.
Famous dialogues:
1. “Bhagu, GMDC mein dal de sab paisa.. evergreen share hai”
Aim in Life:
1. Investing in a stock which will multiply 20 fold in 1 year
2. Starting his own company.
Mistakes committed:
1. Trying to imitate Darinda in the exam.
2. Investing in GMDC.
3. Eating roadside food (apparently, down with jaundice for the second time)
4. Not deleting some personal SMSs.







Name: Shawn Francis
Nickname: Shaaaan
Characteristics:
1. Unbeatable at everything, except growing hair…
2. He can tease any one any time and still will make someone else(read :BAXI) pay for his sins.
3. Stores “codenames” in his phone book
4. Likes girls whose names contain A or S and is attracted to tops having L.E.Ds
5. His tiffin ,for the last 3 years,has been either bread or chicken sausages.
Famous dialogues:
1 “NJ”( says it atleast 3 times in a day)
2 All known English proverbs and GRE words
Aim in life:
1) To be happy and successful in life (and make other people feel miserable,unhappy and total losers!!!)
2) To always remain a “One Woman Man”.
Mistakes commited:
1. Invested in Walchand nagar
2. This dude is a IIT material. Somaiya mein admission leke hug diya.
3 Abusing Vijay shekhar “sir” from his cell which could have landed him in jail.




Name: Sumit Gupta
Nickname: Sumits Guptas, Bhalu, 2,pahad from shahad
Characteristics:
1. Spills either curry, chutney, sauce or all three on all of his assignments.
2. Anything given to him will be returned in 2 pieces (woh CD yaad hai kya?)
3. Goes on a diet after he has a meal only to break it when he sees food again
4. Even a 3 year old speaks more clearly than him.
5. A born actor, the perfect entertainer, you cant stop smiling
when you see him laughing
6. The son of the best chole maker
Famous Dialogues:
1. "Maam, personal problem"
Aim in life:
1) Two crack the CATs
2) Two reduce weightss
3) Two get Placedss..
Mistakes committed:
1. Ate his twin when in his mother's stomach.
2. Turned down Hrithik ka role to appear for his school exams.
3. Cried in front of the class once.







Name: Siddhesh Jadhav
Nickname: Chotte
Characteristics:
1) Doesn’t copy and doesn’t let anyone do that too.
2)Doesn’t put proxies for any of us…
3)Doestn’t bunk lectures for reasons which are not legal.
4)Doesn't abuse.
Famous dialogues:
1) gaggar rishi gaggaaaaarrrrr
2) bajajaj bajabajabaaaj
Aim in life:
1) Be hated by people for his useless principles
2) Be as un-bakwaas as possible
Mistakes commited:
1) He hasn’t commited any mistake…we have commited a big mistake by making him a involuntary member of our gang…!!!!


P.S.: The mistakes committed section has one thing common to all of us. That is ‘doing engineering’. Cause seriously none of us should have ended up here!

BAKWAAS COUNCIL OF MINISTERS

Such is the talent, greatness and potential in the Bakwaas gang that we think we can form our own cabinet and run this country. Actually the world too. But let us start with India first. So here is the Bakwaas council of ministers: our one stop solution to all of India’s problems.

Finance Minister: Kushal Doshi
Currently he is the only guy earning in the gang. So who better than him to manage the country’s finances. And besides considering how stingy he is when it comes to spending money, India will certainly not be in deficit anymore.

Agricultural Minister : Nishit Gogri
Having lived his entire life in Thana gaon, this dude certainly understands the plight of the poor Indian farmer.

Defence Minister: Anurag Agrawal
Considering how scared everyone in college was of ‘Sutta’ India can rest assured that no country will have the courage to attack us with him at the helm.

Home Minister: Kunj Chitalia
This was the easiest portfolio to allocate as Kunj spent most of his four engineering years at ‘home’

External Affairs: Prynk Dshmkh
Legend has it that Priyank has had affairs with so many girls that he has covered all 26 letters of the English alphabet three times over. Rumours are on that he has now switched to Chinese which has 8000 letters in the alphabet. But knowing Priyank’s capacity even that won’t be a challenge for him.

Minister of Iron and Steel: Amit Baxi
Having already established his empire in the iron industry and the future looking bright for a steel ‘merger’, there is no one better for this post than Baxi.

Rural Development and Panchayati Raj: Sumit Gupta
Sumit lives in Shahad, which is currently in news for being the place to host the reality TV show ‘Iss Jungle se mujhe Bachao’. The only member of the gang to be part of the zilla parishad and gram panchayat, this role fits Sumit to the T.

Minister of Science and Technology: Bhavin Doshi
No squabbles for this post as Bhavin is the only member of the gang who doesn’t puke at the word ‘technology’.

Sports Minister: Mohit Dhamdhere
When it comes to sports, Mohit is Numero Uno. Whether it is football, cricket or tongue wrestling, Mohit is our man. He rightfully deserves this ministry.

Minister for Tribal Affairs: Ameya Bhagat
No, I didn’t make this one up. It actually exists. And Bhagu is our unanimous choice for obvious reasons ;)

Foreign Minister: Kunj Chitalia (again)
The only member of Bakwaas to have a healthy relationship with all the other gangs both from and outside our class. It is this very ‘rolling stone’ nature of his that won him this portfolio.

Women Empowerment: Priya Bhabhi
Since she is the only female member of our gang, she finds a prominent place in the Bakwaas cabinet.

Information and Broadcasting: Amit Baxi (again)
Amit has been the ‘hub’ of the bakwaas gang. Any information given to Amit is broadcasted to all members within half an hour. It is precisely because of this that he hasn’t done justice to his potential in the exams. There is little time left to study when one spends 18 hours on the phone.

Internal Affairs: Chirag Dhulla
An affair with his brother’s bhabhi sealed this place for him. Affairs can’t get more ‘internal’ than this.

Tourism Minister: Shawn Francis
The best part of being a tourism minister is that you get to roam the world for free, all expenses borne by the tax payer. That is exactly what Shawn does 3 months a year.

Education Minister : Siddhesh Jadhav
No one in the Bakwaas Gang acts as nerdy as Chotte. If just “acting “ as if yu follow all the educational ethics like “no copying”,”attending all lectures” and “signing no proxies” in your day to day life was the qualification required for this job then no was was more suited than Chotte.

Family Welfare: Yogesh Chande
For very obvious reasons ;)

Minsiter for Renewable Energy: Rishi Gaggar
Yeh minister ka kuch kaam nahi hota hai. He has to just attend parliament and roam around in a chauffeur driven car. Best suited for Susti Rishi.


And now for the most important one, the

Prime minister: Anil Iyer!
Our prime minster is younger, more stylish (wears low waist jeans), has good relations with the Islamic world (shadan) and most importantly is close to the most powerful woman in the country, the bakwaas country that is. If you are wondering who she is, it is she who should not be named. *zipped lips*



----ARTICLE BY "IIM REJECT"!!!!!

Damn we were exhausted!!!!!!

This is the latest video taken yesterday...after Bhaggus and Annas farewell treat.It was their last nightout with Bakwaas gang and they probably wudnt experience one in the next 2 years.They'll be going to US for FURTHER STUDIES.M.S. Fuckin idiots want to do two more years of Goddamn ENGINEERING!!! anyway..we had a blast last night.This video was taken at 6 a.m.We had just dozed and assh*le chotte woke me up to tell me he was going home.Thats the time i woke up and took this never -before-seen video lol!! thats my office btw and the video shows how well we can adapt to almost any hostile conditions.

By the we gave away some amazing gifts to anna and bhaggu.Bhaggu was gifted with "FAIR and LOVELY" so that he gets fairer in the next two years.The cream came with a fairness meter so that he doesnt feel cheated and can actually measure his skin tone. and we gifted Anil with "KAMA SUTRA DOTTED CONDOMS"...hehe.so that he can score on as many chicks and guys he wants and keeps bhaggu safe from getting pregnant.

No!!! we arent so cheap..those were just gag gifts..the real ones were FASTTRACK WATCHES.Which i guess were the First Expensive gifts any one in the BAKWAAS GANG had given to a same gender person!!!!

Anyway ..ill upload the farewell video later..too tired after yesterday. enjoy !!!


P>S

Anna and Bhaagguuu we will misss yuuu guys!!!!!!lots of love...--BAKWAAS GANG!!!!

BAKWAAS Cheat Codes :## D*E*C*O*D*E*D##

At K.J Somaiya College besides having regular lectures ,the students have to endure the weekly tests, long practicals and heavy duty journal completions.
A normal Engineering student goes through all this stuff without regretting ,remorsing or protesting even for a second against this ATYACHAAR on him. He slogs on for hours thinking that this is what engineers are meant to do and have been doing for eternity….

But we at BAKWAAS think differently.
.
We are hell bent on cracking this system and have successfully done so for the last 3 years…..Yeah..of course ..we have had our disappointments and disasters in the process of getting the formula right, but all said and done we have managed fine so far.

The golden rule which we dutifully follow at BAKWAAS

“TO BEAT THE SYSTEM…YOU HAVE TO CHEAT THE SYSTEM”

We wish to pass on the legacy of Beating By Cheating to the new nerds who would be joining engineering after us and those who are the “ hum yeh atyachar nahi sahenge“ types juniors.so?? you ready.

Before we start……a small piece of advice:

STATUTORY WARNING:
1) Use the CHEAT CODES at your own risk
2) No one at Bakwaas is responsible for any mess you would be in after you try this stuff
3) Consequences of using the Cheat Codes is disastrous to future Career.It may make you lazy ,unambitious and “i-dun-give-a-damn” type of person ,ultimately making you overconfident and ruining your life.

Lets get on with the Bakwaas Cheat Codes for making your journey in engineering as eventful and as enjoyable as ours…
Chao!!










SYSTEM TORTURE 1: TESTS
BAKWAAS CHEAT CODE :COPYING


At Somaiya they have invented a genious way of torturing students.Besides final exams we have weekly tests.And if this was not enough we have two tests for every subject .

Normal method:(followed by the SHIT gang):
Study hard for entire previous week. Then study the entire night before the test. Then come to college and learn the difficult part of the portion and give the test.

THE BAKWAAS METHOD:

1) Method 1:
Copy from the person sitting exactly in front or exactly behind you during the test.
If you are Priyank, you can take help from any student sitting anywhere in the class.

This method is time tried and tested.But on some occasions it has failed.
And failed miserably.

Eg:
Situation:
During one of the term tests 3 members of bakwaas gang were sitting as positions indicated
Nishit-----Ameya-----kunj

Ameya had given his answer sheets to both nishit and kunj.

The supervisor was aware of some suspicious movement on these benches and went over to keep an eye on them.
Seeing this, Nishit had a idiotically brilliant idea.He couldn’t copy in front of the supervisor,so he put ameyas sheet behind his own and started copying only the left hand side of the answer .
The supervisor at once saw what was going on; he grabbed the paper from nishit
And said
“Kiska paper hai yeh”
Nishit “ Ma’am Ameyas”

Ameya was already terrified and frightened.
He blurted”.aiiin???par..par..mera paper tere pass kaise aaya..”
The whole class started laughing.
Waah,by sum unknown miracle ameyas paper had simply slipped on to nishits bench..lol
Seeing that the situation was going out of control nishit tried to bribe the supervisor.
Nishit :”ma’am ,cut my attendance…but give my paper”
But in vain …he was robbed of his paper.

Now ameya had another tension.One of his sheet was with Kunj.So he started pinching kunj to give his sheet back to him..
And what did kunj say:
“ Arre bhaggu,maine daal diya tera sheet tere pass..dekh neeche pada hoga..”
So after all this drama ameyas 2nd answer sheet was lying at his feet..Phew….
They got of the soup safe and sound but new comers may take a note of this situation .


2) Method 2:
Another loop hole in K.J is that teachers (on extreme pursuation by students) give Question Banks comprising of 10 important questions out of which 5 will definitely come for the exam.Morover due to lack of answer sheets we had to use our own full scape sheets as supplements for the test.

So the Bakwaas minds started to work on cracking this situation as well.
This requires a bit of hard work but works wonderfully and yu’ll complete your paper in no time

Step 1: Write each of the question(or the most likely questions) on a separate single fullscape sheet at home or early morning before the test in the library.

Step 2: During the test ,for first 45 minutes write just one answer.

Step 3: In the next 15 minutes remove the full scapes containing the answers which have been asked in the exams and staple them to the main supplement.

That’s it you are done.All answers word to word from the text book and so huge making teacher wonder at what speed you write your paper..lol

In case of Official supplements, try smuggling some blank supplements directly after every test. They come handy for the next test.

This has failed only on occasions where people have been clumsy.

Eg:situation:

Sumit ,was writing a term test in the Einstein hall.
While removing the written answer fullscapes from the plastic bag…he made such a fuss that even the most ignorantly deaf man could have been attracted to the noise.
So far it has helped a hell lot of us to get out of term work marks unscatched and unharmed.Thanks to sheet stapling.



3)Method 3:

After they found out that people were scoring extremely well in the test, the Somaiya guys came up with a new idea. They made two different set of papers A and B.
Two students were made to sit side by side and both of them had a different set.

But Bakwaas again , was not to be left behind….

Every member sat with a guy who had studied for the test .
They then wrote the same set which their neighbour was writing
During the signing of the sheet by the supervisor the real set name was written.
But during submission of the answer sheet and on final bell, a hyper chaotic situation was created in the class…and in all the jumbling we changed our answer sets matching to the set from which we had copied the answers.

Thenga to the super intellectual SET theory.

This is actually a high risk method and increases the chances of getting caught if the examiner checks the questions in the set. One such situation arised with Mohit and kunj


Kunj was idiotically copying from the Yogesh’s set A and mohit was sitting behind kunj again copying the same set.
So in all there were 3 people writing the answers from the same set A on two consequitive benches.Mohit,kunj and Yogesh.

Kunj was caught by the supervisor when she checked for the different answers in set A and set B.
When she found that kunj was writing the set A when he was supposed to write set B,she took away his paper.Yogesh was straightaway given a Zero.
This got Mohit in a dilemma…..
So he got on with writing answers from set B
And ultimately Mohits answer sheet consisted of two answers from set A and two answers from set B.lol
SUCH STUPIDITY NEEDS TO BE AVOIDED.Young guns please note!!












SYSTEM TORTURE 2: FINAL EXAMS
Our next stop over: The semester final exam .The most risky of all the situations where you can use the Cheat Codes. This is an extremely HIGH RISK zone where one single mistake may cost you a year or may have you debarred for 3 years.
But nevertheless BAKWAAS GANG members are not to be left behind.


Besides using the normal “aagewale se chapo “ method which is very actively used by Baxi, Kunj, Sutta ,K.K and most other members in the gang, people like myself have introduced more riskier methods of beating the system.
In the “ aagewale se chapo” method a lot is dependent on the person sitting in front of you.And if the person sitting in front of you is someone like shawn,you are screwed.
Reason:
K.K solved a sum and asked the answer to shawn for confirmation.
Shawn said,”tera answer wrong hai”
K.K thought obviously shawns answer would be the right one.So he cancelled his entire sum and copied the sum from shawn.
After coming out of the exam hall,K.K got to know that his previous answer was right and the answer he copied from shawn was the incorrect one.
He told shawn” Saale apna dono ka ek sum wrong gaya hai.Mera answer right tha.faltu mein tera chaapa.Tera bhi wrong and mera bhi wrong”
Shawn replied” Chod yaar.I had solved it as an extra sum .Just to be cautious.I am not losing any marks”
K.K was dumbfounded and vowed never to change the answer of the sums he had solved himself.

Hehehehe.

But if you are desperately in need of marks and are sure you are gonna flunk in exam then here are some methods which have been very successfully implemented cept for some.they are listed below:

Method 1: Easy solutions
The answers given in the “EASY SOLUTIONS” are precise,.to the point and compact enough to be cut and stuffed into your pant pockets.In case where you are a hopeless ,shameless and useless engineer wear 6 pocket pants and a shirt with a upper pocket consisting of an index to tell you which answer is in what pocket.

Disaster: None so far…just keeping my fingers crossed.

Method 2: Nishit method ( highly harmful, extreme caution required)

Carry a cloth pouch cum pencil box with white interiors.
Write answers on the inner side of the pouch.
Act to search for a eraser or sharpener or refill every 10 minutes and read the answer from the pouch.
After every exam give the pouch to your “Kaamwali bai” for thorough washing,
So that you can have it ready for the next exam.

Disaster:
Gaavwala getting caught with his pouch confiscated and facing severe consequences which were not effective enough for him as he still copied regularly in his term tests.



SYSTEM TORTURE 3: PRACTICALS


Though not as torturous as lectures,the practicals may get very boring if you do not have good innovative and creative friends like the bakwaas gang members around.
These creations can be dubbed as the most intellectual ways of passing time in computer practicals and may be used without the fear of getting caught and whats more…the professor may actually think you are working hard on the program.

Some of Bakwaas gang’s highly sophisticated ways of passing 3 hours in any Computer practicals can be given as below:

GAMES WE PLAY:

Game 1:
CD DRIVE RACE:
This involves any number of players and an appropriate number of umpires to keep a watch.
Here on the umpires signal all the players press the CD drive button on their pc.
The member whose CD drive opens full and closes fastest is the WINNER.
HINT( it helps if the umpire is a friend)

Game 2:
BINARY GAME:
Here you have to form binary numbers using the 3 LED lights to the right of your key board.
Use the 3 keys SCROLL LOCK,NUM LOCK and CAPSLOCK on the keyboard to change the lights.
Eg:
If the umpire says number “2”
The binary representation is : 0 1 0
So only the middle light should be on ,the other lights have to be off.. So you just press Caps lock.
One who does so fastest is the WINNER.
(HINT: it helps if you don’t have a K.T in DLDA)

Game 3:
Define a point on the C++ screen , and get the cursor to the exact point as decided by the umpire.
HINT: No amount of cheating can help you in this game. Its purely a talent based game.



PRANKS WE PLAY:

Besides playing games we do fool around with each others computers and do hell lot of prankings.

Some of them are:

1)Shutting neighbours pc, without his knowledge
2)Transfering songs and movies from the folder which has been very generously filled by other Bakwaas gang members who have already done good work in the practical labs.
3)Press lever of partners chair making his seat drop down.
4)Go out on the pretext of going to the loo and come back after having 2 vadapavs ,one dabeli and socializing with other bakwaas members

PRACTICALS WE PERFORM:

How we have survived the practicals till now is still an unsolved mystery to us.
I guess the various unique strategies we use have helped us pass through the 6 semesters without anyone having a hint that we are miserable at programming.
Anyway,our most important strategies include:

1)Copy from neigbour (only if its bhavin or palak)

2)Access divyas ,bhavins or other shit gang members pc using network ip addresses and get the readymade programs from their computers.

3)Search for programs previously done by other studious jerks and rename them with yur name…gives it a personal touch you see.

NOTE FROM THE AUTHOR:
If everything else fails then just do some basic stuff ..like writing all the header files you know like:

#include stdio.h
#include conio.h
#include math.h
(I know only these,since past 3 years)



Next time when the teacher asks for the programs…..speak out this eternally famous dialogue
“MAAM, ACTUALLY LAST TIME I HAD DONE THE PROGRAM.
IT WAS EVEN RUNNING.BUT I CANT FIND IT NOW.
SOME ONE MUST HAVE DELETED IT.
”
Has saved us all of us n number of times.




SYSTEM TORTURE 4: JOURNAL COMPLETION
At Bakwaas we follow strict rules.
One does not complete any journals before correction date is announced.
Only once the correction and submission dates have been announced we start gathering ammunition for the WAR.

We use the following methods dedicatedly

1) Method 1:
Collect all the journal material from the most punctual guys in the class.
Buy 2 bundles of both side ruled and one side ruled journal pages
Arrive at Priyanks place at 11.00 pm
Complete all journals amidst Loud Rock Music with Baxi as the DJ changing songs on priyanks PC.

2) Method 2:
Get thejournals writen from someone else at a price
Bakwaas gang does not follow this method as we do not have the policy of spending luxurious money on something as unimportant as journals.
But CHOR GANG follows this method regularly.

3) Method 3:
Write any shit and correct the journals your self.
Usually these journals are given to Darinda for correction as he is considered the most accurate forger of the lot..
But after himself getting caught by Prof.Chandan,his popularity has received a kind of blow. None the less he is not the one to give up and has continued doing favours for others long after the episode.



SYSTEM TORTURE 5: ATTENDANCE

“Attendance” is the only factor which is a motivation for people like us to attend college against our will be it hurricane,tornado.eartquake or even an India-Pakistan or MAN U – ARSENAL match.



1) Method 1:

Proxy in abundance

The age old method of improving your attendance even if you have never attended college in your entire term.
Check out which lecturers allow proxy and you can tell other Bakwaas gang members especially Bhavin or any other SHIT gang member to put your proxy.You can definitely bank on these guys.They are fully trustworthy.


2) Method 2:

Fake medical certificates

If proxies are difficult to come by,you can use fake medical certificated from your family docs,doctor uncles or aunties to sign a month long leave for you.
If you are Nishit gogri then you always have helpful medicos like KETAN DOCTOR who give you medical certificates on basis of family relations.

3) Method 3:

Start writing board papers from start of the term

At Somaiya ,people whose attendance is not upto par after the end of the term,are made to write previous board papers. Some people are extremely cautious and start writing papers from the start of the term.Always helps at the nd.

4) Method 4:

Just don’t do anything…yull scrape through anyways.

This has been the case with most of the guys in the BAKWAAS gang who have struggled to keep their attendance even upto 50%. This priviledged member group consist of Nishit ,Mohit ,kunj on a regular basis.
I have heard Somaiya has started producing attendance defaulters list with Nishit, Kunj and Mohits name already printed on them.




I would have wanted to add our VIVA and LECTURE adventures as well…but that some other day guys.. till then enjoy folks!!!

How the Bakwaas Gang evolved from the eyes of Shawn Francis

How the Bakwaas Gang evolved from the eyes of Shawn Francis
Note: Everything that is stated here is solely my view on a whole lot of things. Favoritism may have caused some facts to be distorted but then that is the advantage of being author. So let us now turn back the pages.



First Semester Engineering, 2005:I had just got out of junior college and everyone had told me what a torture engineering is going to be. I was prepared for the worst. I used to talk to my building watchman everyday for ten minutes to perfect my Hindi and held regular conversations with my maid to improve on my Marathi. I thought engineering would be a ‘defining phase’ of my life and to drive home the point, I had skipped my family vacation to some country and attended the Orientation day of college. So far, so good. It was now the first day of college.
I entered college and ran to see the list on which my name was put up. I saw my roll number. It was really long. It took me two minutes to memorise it (not everyone is an Ameya Bhagat. This guy has the insane ability to even mug up diagrams). I then started looking at the names above and below me. Not a single girl anywhere in sight! I reminded myself that this was engineering college. Finally I found the name Deepti Jadhav. The name was very ordinary and so I had modest expectations. I stepped into class. Our class was plunged in darkness. The tube lights weren’t working. I strained my eyes and saw that there were three rows. All guys had occupied the side rows and the middle row was occupied by the girls. I decided to maintain the sanctity of the place and along with Kalpesh sat on the left hand side row.
Kalpesh, my first acquaintance in engineering, thanks to Moiz, a building friend. Kalpesh and Moiz were together in classes and so I was introduced to Kalpesh. The lecture started. Our teacher Shivangi Ruparel (SR) was by far the best looking female in class. Five minutes into the lecture, in walked Yogesh Chande and defiling the holiness of our class sat straight in the middle row and broke an unwritten rule that girls and guys would sit in separate rows. This revolutionary has gone on to break a lot many rules in engineering. Fifteen minutes later enters Khushbu Busa and plonks herself behind Chande. Two minutes later I turn and see both of them sitting together and laughing away to glory. I decide that Yogesh must be a girl magnet. I make a mental note to make friends with him. He seems good company. Behind me were Rishi Gaggar and Anurag Agrawal. SR tells us that Dayal and Tayal are good books for mechanics. Anurag didn’t hear the names. So he asked me to write down the names. I wrote down Tayal and Payal. Anurag likes the name Payal and we instantly hit off.
During the lunch break, Kalpesh and I used to eat in the canteen. Kalpesh used to keep on complaining that he wanted to form a group. Apparently only my company wasn’t good enough for him. In a few days he left and joined the now infamous shit gang. In the meantime Chande and I became good friends. We used to have a lot of fun in class. Chande was friends with Baxi. So I got introduced to Baxi. After shaking hands with Baxi, I told him that his laces are untied. He looks down and goes to tie them, only to realize he is wearing floaters. Little did Baxi know that the insignificant handshake would change his life dramatically. Saurabh Bajaj was a hostelite like Anurag and so Anurag bought him into our group. Another member (can’t exactly call her a member, but she spent a lot of time with us) was Ajanta. And so within 10 days of college, I found myself in a group of 6. This group satisfied all my needs. If only Kalpesh had hung on for some more time his life would never have been the same again. But here is the initial group:
Shawn: That’s me. Evil, wicked, always plotting, self obsessed and perennially lucky.
Baxi: Exactly opposite. Very innocent and perennially unlucky. An example of Baxi ka bholapan was that he showed me videos of his ‘friend’, one hour after getting introduced to me!
Chande: Fun to be with, but a little bit moody.
We three were inseparable in the first semester. Our outer ring consisted of:
Anurag: Was always running out of college to smoke. Spoke a dialect of Hindi which I didn’t understand at first.
Saurabh: Very efficient and sincere. He gave us the assignments. He also had finished the portion before the college had started, so was a help in studies.
Ajanta: She had purchased the brown files of submission before I had purchased my ream of ruled sheets also. She was responsible for supplying us with print outs and giving us experiments.
Back to present day, the outer ring has almost left bakwaas. The inner ring remains intact though. So in the first semester this group of 6 was formed. But what were the others doing then? Here is something about them:
Priyank: He used to wear three fourths and sleeveless shirts and roam around with a basketball. He had the knack of being extremely irritating. Was the most despised guy in class. Vivek Mapara was a close second. Now the crown lies with a certain Mitesh Mehta! He used to talk with the girls only and used to keep munching on his stupid chewing gum. Nobody liked him. Sumit once told me, “Ladke mar gaye kya ki yeh un ladkiyon se hi itna baat karta hain”
Sumit: Sumit is very noticeable so we all knew that he was part of the class. One day he came and sat next to me and said, “Main jinke saat bait tha hoon who log bahut boring hai (referring to the Dombivili gang). Tum log ke saat majha aayega.” He did not give me a chance to refuse him. He just sat next to me!
Siddhesh: Siddhesh was shorter than me and was always referred to as Chotta Shawn. He initially had a problem with this. Bear in mind this was the first semester and he didn’t know that being associated with me was going to be his greatest achievement in his insignificant life. During one electronics lab, he started protesting. He said that I should be called Bada Siddhesh. So an agreement was reached. We both worked on different kits and whoever got the right answer first would be known by his own name. The rest, as they say, is history.
Ameya: Ameya had no identity of his own. He was Chotta Shawn’s sidekick. He spent the entire first year sticking next to Chotte like glue.
Mohit: Mohit was the same. He hasn’t changed. Even in semester one he used to not attend. He didn’t have his bike at that time. And so I had seen him only in the lab.
Rishi: He was my lab partner and so an automatic inclusion in the gang. The ice breaker came when I caught him red handed in the workshop building.
Bhavin: I had come across Bhavin in the Computer Lab. All of us from A2 used to gather and have our famous ‘round table conference’ but Bhavin used to religiously write his program and store it in his BKD folder. Some habits die hard.
Kushal and Chirag: KK and Dhulla used to roam around together always. They reminded me of those typical Gujratis who wear those funny elaborate costumes and dance around with sticks during that 9 day festival.
Nishit and Kunj: Nishit was more recognizable by his voice than anything else and Kunj by his height.
This was the state of our class for the first one month. I was very happy. Baxi and Chande kept me entertained. Ajanta gave me experiments and print outs. Saurabh gave me assignments. Saurabh used to go on frequent trips to the canteen and treat Ajanta to bhel and dahi puri. Chande, Baxi and I used to always sit together in class. Once Poonam ma’am was fed up with our continuous blabbering that she finally said, “Roll numbers 31,17,9 get out of the class!!!”
Some days later, Yogesh volunteered to be the class representative. I used to wonder as to why he did that. It was only later on that a lot of things began to fall in place and I saw through this move of his. We had great fun calling him CR and boy he used to get real pissed. We lived happily till one mechanic practical. Anil was sitting next to me. He said, “You are from St. Annes school? I was in your class. You were the class monitor. I always admired you. Can I spend more time with you?” Now I am not one to decline requests made in such a polite manner and so Anil aka Anna became the seventh member of our gang. After a month and a half of practicals, A2 batch became a very close knit unit and with the introduction of Anil, came a whole lot of others. This was the state till the end of the first semester engineering. Along with the above listed names, Nikhil Galapure was also part of the group.



Second Semester Engineering, 2006:In the second semester, we shifted to the polytechnic building. It was without doubt the best semester to attend college. The benches were so huge that five of us could sit on one bench (or four if one was Sumit) Towards the start of this semester, Yogesh drifted away from us. He along with Nishit, Priyank and Kunj used to sit separately far far away from the epicenter of bakwaas. The reasons came to light only a few semesters later. At that time I thought that probably he grew bored of us and wanted a change. Kushal used to sit ahead of us and Angad and I used to keep slapping him from behind. One day Kushal, I, Sumit and Nikhil were sitting together on a bench in that order. It was Jumana ma’ams lecture. We were bored to death. C++ kabhi samjha hi nahi apne ko. So we decided to have a little fun. KK and I pushed Sumit with such force that the wafer thin Galapure flew in the air and went sailing across the row, only to land squarely on Vidhi Maroo (Shit gang Ltd. Member) That day Gala decided enough was enough. Never again did he return to the Bakwaas gang. Along with Gala, Ajanta also left us. She started sitting with the Mother India gang. Anurag was away in Kanpur for most of the semester. Another crazy thing that kept happening this semester was that whenever a teacher would call out the name of a bakwaas member, all the people sitting in that row would get up and make way for him to go to the first bench. It was in this semester that thanks to Anil we started discovering another facet of our personality. During this sem, I got to know KK, Dhulla, Anna and Mohit very well. Dhulla and KK are credited with the honour of bestowing upon us the name Bakwaas. ‘Bakwaas!’ was their standard reply to whatever anyone said to them. This rubbed off on the rest of us also and we also started saying Bakwaas so much that our gang was christened the bakwaas gang *trumpets*. This landed me in trouble once:
Hetal ma’am (with her hand in a cast): Shawn, write your program fast. Stop talking.
Shawn (the suck up that he is): Ma’am your hand is broken? How come? How did it happen? It must be so painful for you? When did this happen?
Hetal: Apne hi toh maara mujhe. Islliye haath toot gaya.
Shawn: BAKWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSS
Hetal: Kya? You said bakwaas to a ma’am? Give me you I card? How dare you say bakwaas?
Thankfully my guardian angel happened to pass by (Poonam ma’am) and I was saved. So this semester saw our class dynamics change a bit. These were the members of the different gangs in our class.
Bakwaas: (inner circle) Shawn, Baxi, Anna, KK, Dhulla, Bajaj, Sumit(s)
(outer circle) Anurag, Chotte and his sidekick, Mohit, Rishi and Bhavin
Bakwaas rebels/ Pinky: Priyank, Nishit, Kunj and Yogesh. Pinky if you take their initials.
Shit Gang: Aakash, Bandish, Kalpesh, Mitesh, Khushbu, Palak, Asmita, NJ, Vidhi. Group name evolved as the names of all the guys end with Sh.
Dombivili Fast: Our Galasaheb, Kardile, Praful, Prathamesh, Sagar, Loya, Swapnil etc etc. Group name evolved as all of them lived in Dombivili.
Mother India: Divya, Laxmi, DJ, Trupti, Kajal. Group name evolved as all members were very sincere and dressed in clothes preserving the rich cultural heritage of our country.
Chor Gang: Mapara, Kunal, Magar, Saurabh Agrawal, Mundada. Group name evolved as the members were always found using unfair means of increasing their attendance and kept falling in trouble with the authorities.


Third Semester Engineering, 2006:
At the beginning of the third semester, the pinkies joined the bakwaas gang again. We welcomed them with open arms. Ameya Bhagat began to have an identity of his own. We started realizing that he was fun to be with. He too realized that there was a world apart from Chotte. He blossomed and bloomed in our company. Priyank started wearing normal clothes like the rest of us and stopped chewing gum. He also got bored with the girls and now was a permanent fixture of our group. And he was some company. Our gang was now bigger and better and we continued to live happily ever after. The following semesters did no see the addition of any new member, nor did any one leave the gang. It was only until the seventh semester that the Bakwaas gang officially had their eighteenth and most special member. Welcome Bhabhi   

POLICE ENCOUNTERS!!!!!

In the last 3 years of being a engineering student cum a bakwaas gang member.i have experienced all that one would expect to experience when he is a highly notoriously famous gang member..including the cops!!!…we have had 3 memorable solid encounters with the Mumbai police..
All the 3 encounters had the following things common between them

1) all of them happened post mid night
2) all of them involved one constant member “my car”
3) all of them involved hyper active participartion of atleast one bakwaas gang member who almost screwed our case…( in 2 cases it was Baxi who voluntarily tries to help but unfortunately always simply screws the case…in the other one it was nishit “the gaavwala” who tried to be a jerk)

lets get going with the narration of our encounters

ENCOUNTER 1:

The gang members were all holed in at my place( we usually do that before going for big outing) the night before we were leaving for the “GREAT MATHERAN TRIP” .
We decided to have dinner post-dinner-time at a mohit-chande-priyank find restaurant called “THE LIGHT OF ASIA”..which has now become our regular 3 am dining spot at V.T.The restaurant apart from being open past decent dining hours is famous for its hugely delicious food,for its reasonability and for its complimentary ice creams.
So after having dinner,and fighting for the extra ice cream sticks(which ended with k.k picking up the stick fallen on the road)…we decided to go on a long ride to marine drive and chill out there.
There were 6 of us:
Priyank: driving seat
Mohit: girl friend seat
Yogesh and Susti:passenger seat
Anna and Baxi :back sit driving seat

Anna: chal bhagga Priyank….120 ke neeche nahi chahiye mereko….

His words sent a virtual nitro booster thrill to my accelerator…I pumped it.

Chande : yeah anna pagal ho gaya hai…Priyank tu sun mat…

Baxi: bhaari darinda….

Anna: Priyank accelerator pe khada ho jaaa……khaada hi ho jaa ab tu….

Chande:ye Priyank ..yeah anna aur baxi chaddha rahe hai …tu chad mat…
He was really scared..lolzzz

Mohit: Priyank tu chala…yeah chande ka sun mat..phattu hai…!!!

I wasn”t listening to anyone except anna…..his words still ringing “khada ho jaa accelerator pe”
Lolzzzzzz
I aspired to going beyond hundred……I looked at the speedometer..it was vibrating at 86..almost pleading “don’t test me..i aint a sports car..i am a family car…”
Family…BOOOONNNNG
Not told mom about taking the car out…
Dad had no idea his son is on a joy ride with friends…
One scratch…one single bump on the car…I will be dethroned off my drivers seat straight to my scooty seat..no ..not done…
Nitro booster vanish.. pumping vanish.. anna vanish….
The speed is now 60….
baxi ,anna ,mohit..not happy
chande happy…he will live to marry p*i*a
rishi not concerned….whatever comes easiest or first..

Baxi: sun yaar lets sit here…majja karenge…
Mohit: wahi yaar ..itne jaldi nahi nikal naa hai…
Baxi: haan..i know this one spot…
Mast hai..
It has a jetty and all…
You can see the entire Mumbai skyline from there…
Munnabhai ka shooting hua tha udhar…
Priyank:haan kya???
Baxi:yup..
Chande..chal chalte hai….
Susti:yawning..chalOO!!!


.
That’s baxizz word….its always final..and its decorated with tempting words,adjectives and adverbs…in the first half of our engineering career everyone trusted baxi for all great things…some people still do…but ask victims like susti…they’ll tell you…baxis CAT maths though good…his VODKA maths is all screwed up…susti trusted baxi for vodka maths..till recently when he uncovered the mystic way in which he always got drunk and baxi didn’t…
His secret formula was…
What susti thot….half vodka + half sprite = half vodka +half sprite
But what really was half vodka +half sprite = full vodka +one spoonful sprite..
Lolzzzzzzz


Anyway..back to our story…
We got down at the far end of marine drive……where marine drive ends…hoped out of the car…and on to the pavement…
There was a couple sitting there talking…
Baxi passed by them…
We passed by them..
We were all following baxi on the dandi march to this mysteriously awesome jetty….
I still don’t know why we were so excited to get to the jetty..as if mallika was doing a nude dance there…

Suddenly we heard a loud…
SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECH of tyres…
We looked back..everyone except baxi….who was stuck on his goal to get salt of this dandi march…
A group of men jumped out..and drove away the couple sitting there..
They looked at us and one of them called out
”IDHAR AAO”

Priyank: baxi..yaar shayad who hum logon ko bulaa rahe hai…
Baxi: apna baap hai kya bulaane ko….

Mohit.:.shayad baap hi hai dost…police…

POLICE!!the word kinda sends a signal to the spinal cord and shivers it a little..no matter yu have done wrong or rite….

But we were bakwaas gang members…all of us were oozing with over confidence and a virtually magnified ego…

LEKIN…ANDAR SE…. PHATI THI SABKI

“ITKYA RAATRI KAY PHIRTAAY”

Marathi…I was relieved..i am so proud of my mother tongue…especially in Mumbai…it bails me out of almost everything…my teachers,the traffic police and more importantly the T.C.

I started..” kahi nahi sir…asech phirat hoto…just dinner karoon aalo..”

“ITKYAA RAATRI….WHAT ARE YU GUYS DOING OUT SO LATE”???

Mohit: sir we are engineering students….just done with our exams..we are going to matheran tomorrow morning..so staying at his place”

I guess the ENGINEERING word had a effect on the cop….he seemed kinda relieved…
I suppose that’s the only thing that’s happened worthwhile in engineering..we have got a B.E tag…tag to prove decent and nerdy…
Cop”ok,ok…where are you from…”

DADAR
CHEMBUR
GHATKOPAR
ANDHERI
KANDIVLI..

We screwed it our selves….we were sounding like terrorists come from all parts of Mumbai to plan a major bomb planting session in here…

Baxi” sir AAMHI actually ASHHECH IKDEE…”

Baxi hug raha tha…luckily mohit stopped him on time…

MOHIT: sir we study at somaiya college vidyavihar..aani udya matheran la chalalo aahot..mhanoon aamhi hyaachyaa ghari thamblo..”

Cop(now fed up)” ok alright gimme your addresses….”
WOW..adresses…
What the fuck are these guys gonna do???cum up to our place in the morning and tell my mom…shit..i will be so dead…
I wanted to bluff the address badly..but thought its too much complicated right now so ill just give him the rite stuff he needs…I just wanted to get out of this place..fast..

I blurted out the address..
He asked mohit then..”mohit told him”
Meanwhile I was chatting with the other cop

Where are you staying in matheran
“not decided yet sir…well go there and then book”
Thers a good place called mayor resort..”
Ahh ok…

The other guy was done taking the addresses…he called out to this cop….

ACCHA..LISTEN…..GO HOME NOW…DON’T ROAM ABOUT AT NIGHT…
YOU NEVER KNOW WHICH GANG MAY TURN UP AND EVEN BEAT UP YOU GUYS…FOR MONEY OR WHATEVER…THERE ARE DRUNK MOBS OUT THERE…

Alrite sir we’ll get going immediately…

I jumped into the car…and accelerated at 60…anna didn’t say anything…
We were finally out….(we had thought we would end up in jail)

Baxi:”Saala accha hua VODKA ka bottle nahi laaya”

I was relieved…..he did something RIGHT that night…lolzzzzzz
WE HAVENT SEEN THE JETTY TILL DATE!!!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


ENCOUNTER 2:
This is a short stint which happened at marine drive..

On one of our late night drives….we were strolling on the drive after the dinner at light of asia….
There was a whole caravan with us
My car…driven by Mr nishit gogri….who had left his glasses at home…..and cudnt see the man sleeping on the road…(my license was lost)
Mohits bike
Chandes bike
…
We parked our entire troup on the corner of pavement…and went on and sat on the bunk facing the sea…..
(FAR FAR AWAY FROM THE JETTY WHERE MUNNABHAI WAS SHOT )

Just then..the police car passed by…
POLICE AGAIN…
Priyank: yaar…yeh police 100% uthayega apne ko idhar se…

The police van stopped..
A officer stepped OUT.....

Wat yu doing out …..whose car is this????

I said “sir mine”

Whoss driving
NISHIT” sir me”

Why??
Priyank:”Sir I don’t have license”

You have car papers??
Priyank”yes sir”

You have license??
Nishit “ yes sir..BUT MERA LICENSE THANE KA HAI”




Now why did this guy had to blurt out the last sentence…he could have just shown the license and finished the stuff…
But no he has to say..what he wants to say….
Like in his presentation…
“we are working for a company WHICH IS A B.S.E LISTED COMPANY”
Galat time pe galat cheez bakega yeh banda….

Anyway..back to our story….
The cop didn’t get wat he was saying…
I came to his rescue as usual..(not out of saviority…it was my car at stake)
Priyank”Nothing sir….he has license…”
Nishit”yes yess..i have it”

Cop:gud..get along…stop sitting out here…

NISHIT AND HIS THANE WOULD HAVE SCREWED OUR STUFF…
But lets not talk bad about him…the dudes got jaundice right now….he may die anyday…lolzz..jokin gogri…take care man!!!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

ENCOUNTER 3:
Something which I forgot to mention in my earlier “phoonk” blog…..

We were at the ruia katta…after our disastrous 22nd of august…..

After the stench was gone….a police car came by (possibly attracted by the smell)

We were standing in front of the building…near the katta…there was a pav bhaji cart right next to where we were standing..
It was past 12…and the stall was closing down…

The police shouted “GAADI KISKA HAI”

Now baxi has the habit of getting his wrong foot stuck at the wrong place….
He thought the police was asking about our car which was parked near by…
But in reality the police was addressing the pav bhaji cart…..

Baxi :”hamara hai”

Baap…baxi became the owner of my car and the pav bhaji cart at the same time….


Luckily..the misunderstanding got sorted out in a jiffy….and nothing more miserable happened further that night…
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

That’s so much for our encounters….i guess we still have around a year before we get out of our college…
But these memories will always stay by us…..cherish them all life long…
Who knows there may be more encounters waiting for us in the following year…
As long as OUR GANG IS AROUND
But yaa for most of this adventures thanks to baxi…
Dude you have made engineering memorable for us…..will live with these experiences forever…..thanks baxi…seriously dude…thank you soo muccccccchhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!

KAAM@ -SU- TeRA????...a post about YOGESH'S KAAM!!!

“Chal yaar Priyank..ill leave..”Yogesh said
It was my third semester in k.j somaiya college of engineering. when we had just finished our 3.30pm lecture. I and yogesh were pretty good friends by then…the bakwaas gang was just beginning to form..

“Wait yaar ..itnaa jaldi jaake kya karega..”I said…

“arre yaar kaam hai”…

“kya kaam hai??”

“arre yaar bata nahi sakta”

“accha chod….see yaa tomorrow then..”

I let him go….

But a “dhulla??” shouted in my mind…”what the hell is kaam”

Its been 3 years now..
HE STILL LEAVES EVERY EVENING GIVING THE SAME SHIT" YAAR KAAM HAI"
i ..nor any of the bakwaas gang member knows what exactly this KAAM of his is…

It was curiosity first..
“what can it be…??”

It became frustration later…
“What the hell is it…??”

Its become a teaser now
“ yogesh you coming with us..or you have KAAM??”…lolzzzzz

All the bakwaas gang members are pretty aware of yogesh,s KAAAM crap…

We all have had our share of assumptions of what exactly his kaam could be..

We know three things for sure:

1) his Kaam takes place in the evening
Reasons:
a) he leaves early every evening .
b) his phone is unavailable all the 2 hrs from 6.30 to 8.30.
c) whenever you are lucky enough to get through he’ll say”yaar bahar hoon..ill talk to you later”


2) his Kaam pays him a lot
Reasons:
a) he pays all his college fees himself
b) he is never short of money
c) who can afford a girlfriend these days???

3) his Kaam is something either too embarrassing or too sophisticated
Reasons:
1)if it was not..he would have told us about it till now.
2)whenever he gets a call ( supposedly from a high authority) he moves away and converts his accent and says..”ya..yaa.ok..ya”
3) he said he hasn’t told ANYONE not even to THE “ONE” WHO HE IS SUPPOSED TO TELL EVERYTHING.


I asked him once ”yaar yogesh…why don’t you tell us what your KAAM is?”
Yogesh” I am too superstitious..i suppose something bad will happen if I tell people what this kaam is”

As if any of the bakwaas gang member will believe that…
Seriously…

Its not that we still haven’t guessed what his KAAM can be…
Here are some conclusion that bakwaas gang members thought could be yogesh’s KAAM

CONCLUSION 1:
Yogesh may be a high profile PIMP..who operates call- girls at around evening time. That job supposedly pays him a lot .

CONCLUSION 2:
Yogesh may be a software developer of a big software firm and trades in dollars

CONCLUSION 3:
May be all this is bullshit and Yogesh probably studies like a nerd from 6.30 to 8.30 ..and likes to keep it under wraps..

CONCLUSION 4:
Yogesh is trying to make himself famous by spreading crap like ”kaam” around..so that we might may pay him to make him vomit out the secret..

CONCLUSION 5:
He spends time around with p*i*a.

CONCLUSION 6:
The Kaam would be too tempting and full of rich benefits.he doesn’t want to share it cause he is insecure we might steal it and become better earners then him.

But I know…all of these assumptions are 100% wrong…cause we have kinda kept a voluntary watch on him…
He doesn’t know many girls to be a pimp…
He sucks as software developer even in college project…
He doesn’t get great percentages..though he scores better than most of us..
He is already famous enough
He spends a hell lot of time with his girl in the college hours….
He knows how hard we try we can never be as good as earners as him….


So I guess we’ll never ever..atleast in this life time will get to know what his KAAM is….the secret of his KAAM will go to the grave with him….
CHANDE’S soul will rest in peace
But the rest of the bakwaas gang,’s spirits…will still be wondering..

“SAALA ISKAA KAAM KYA HAI”


p.s: 1)congrats anna for his fabulous 1450..way to go dude..
2)GANPATI BAPPA MORYA!!!!